I am ME

paint but I'm not a painter. I draw but I'm not an artist. I write but I'm not an author. I sing but I'm not a singer. I dance but I'm not a dancer. I act but I'm not an actor nor an actress.

I make people laugh but I'm not a comedian. I make people scared but I'm not Freddy Kruger. I have my own followers but i'm not a king. I've enemies but I'm not a criminal. I influence people but I'm not a politician. I can change people but I'm not a magician.

I am me...

Sincerely me.

****(as posted in FB by me just now.... today)

Faith

Once the worlds collide
always seek deeper
never let lights blind you
never let talks deafen you
never let laughter poke you
never let rumours break you
never let madness rule you

Once the worlds collide
always have faith
as you are who you are

My Bracelet Is Missing

I'm depressed. I'm devastated. The day began quite chaotic. Rushing to send my kids for their tuition, went home & later on went to a kenduri. Nice food. Oily & fattening. Spoilt my new diet routine. Had to eat 'em all. Then, after the kenduri, while changing, I realised something was missing! My bracelet! MY GOLD HABIB JEWEL BRACELET was GONE! My fav bracelet was and is missing in action!

My fault... my mistake... I was careless. I didn't realise it fell off from my wrist. I was to be blamed for this missing piece of jewellery. What should I do? I've tried to seek for it almost everywhere but it's too small. Maybe someone took it & claimed it's his or hers. I panicked but I was helpless. I'm still helpless. I've no idea what to do. The expensive bracelet is somewhere but WHERE?

Ya Allah, the almighty God, please help me.... I'm in despair... I want my bracelet back!!!!!!

PROGRAM DIETKU BERMULA

Today is already the 2nd day. I've tried to commit myself to this adventure... which has been postponed for such a long time. I hope the program will be my motivation to lose a few inches here & there as well as getting back my ideal weight. I'm not greedy. Losing 15kg within 50 days is fine.... hehehe...

If you want to know all about my personal quest to be slimmer & healthier, go to my other new blog HERE Yeah.. yeah.. yeah.. I know.. at first I wanted to share all my experience in losing weight here but somehow I'd like this world to be MY WORLD of peace & harmony. I need a place where only thoughts are expressed without limitation... So that's why the other world exists... all because of my new venture into the world of health & finess. No worry. I'll always visit this wonderful of ME coz I love being here....

LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL... isn't it? & wish me the best of luck in MY LOSING WEIGHT ADVENTURE journey...

menjelang program diet 50 hari part 2

Feeling a little bit nervous about the program as i'm not so sure about my self-discipline... can i control myself from the temptation to eat & eat & eat? Before, i wasn't worried at all about my weight coz though i ate a lot, i'd still be slim. Itu dolu2.. before 30. Now? Ntah ler...

So let's see what i took for lunch today. Rice, chicken tomyam (hasil air tangan My cik Abg.. hehehe..) & 2 fried fish. Plus skyjuice... hehehe...

Dinner? Oooppss... at KFC... coz next week can't go there la...

I purchased apples, grapes & fresh orange juice for myself at Tesco just now. Must prepare all these in case i feel hungry at night. The problem is.... my kids luv the fruits too. Kena kongsi ler.. hehehe..

OK. Next time i'll list down my diet menu. Must have a diary too. Must do research on what to eat & what not to eat. Must cut down a lot... huhuhu... kuatkah imanku ini? i rest my case.

menjelang program diet 50 hari

Next week will be the beginning of my adventure in losing weight... errr... for the second time & i hope i'll be more serious as Rm20 will be paid to join the program. So today i'll update what i've eaten so far....

Breakfast : Roti Arab, kuah sardin & nescafe ais
***Not a good breakfast coz.... too oily, too much sugar... but it's yummy... hmmm...
But I did eat papaya which has helped my digestion.
***Berjaya ke toilet lepas mkn betik... bagusss...

Lunch? Haven't eaten yet but as usual rice & lauk pauk.
***Reminder: Drink a lot of sky juice aka plain water yer Rosh! Today... none yet!

I've received the aerobics DVD... good news but the bad news is... I haven't started exercising... hahaha!!! Err.. next week ler yer..

p.s. Went to Mini Karnival Karangkraf near Jam Besar Sg Petani this morning & guess what? Borong majalah mcm nak rak but forgot to buy "Rapi" which offers a lot of tips about health & fitness. Dpt rege spesel plus hadiah lg... hmmm.. Nak kena pi lg ni... hihihi.. Bab perabih duit mmg no. 1.. alahai..

Mesin rosak kot!

Sbb tak percaya bila tengok angka hampir mencecah 70kg di rumah... maka kujejak Tesco utk misi suciku ini..... memastikan beratku tu tak ler berat sgt... Terbeliak bijik mataku melihat angka yg bknnya makin mengurang tp makin bertambah..... Dulu timbang 69.2. Sekarang sudah 69.6? Biar betul!

Konpem mesin tu rosak. Sahih!

Moralnya di sini... mesti join jugak diet program tuh... Mana ler tau... mesin mmg tak rosak tp cara pemakananku yg rosak... Cuti2 ni kan byk kenduri.... Selamat aku bersama pelbagai juadah enak2...... huhuhu..

PROGRAM DIET: Ada berani?

Hmm... I dare not look at my new weighing scale. Mcm rosak jer... Blh caya ker? It's only RM10, purchased from D.I.Y Shop. I should buy a more reliable scale..errr.. mcm di Tesco atau di shopping mall tu... Today, with lots of "kenduri", my dream to lose weight is just a dream... alahai! Sabor je la. Tapi tak per.... While blogwalking, I saw this CONTEST. Baeekkk punyer... GOOD MOOD & HEALTHY DIET CONTEST by LWC... Mcm best jer... Blh ler join nih! Kot2 blh kureng lelemak badanku & berlaku penurunan yg memberangsangkan! Wow! Such a brilliant idea nih! This contest can motivate my mission. Kalau uols pon tertarik (mcm ler ada org jenguk blog gua... hehehehe..), sila ler klik SINI . Yelah, mana ler tau lepas 50 hari badanku slim melim mcm zaman anak dara dolu.. ahak! ahak! Bahagianyer...

Makanya, esok kena la ambik gambar diri & gambar beratku d penimbang. Nk timbang di mana ya? Penimbang baruku? Huh! Sooooo unreliable! Errr... d Tesco? Bakal dipertimbangkan.

psstttt..... My Aerobics DVD is otw.... Tak sabarnyer... ngeeee...

My LoW Ad - Day 13

Should I cry or should I laugh?
The days pass by... the spirit seems to melt down
The crave & the hunger never stop
Heavier now & tomorrow to come?
Losing strength is not my NO. 1 priority
Losing this game should never be
To lose or not to lose?
That's the quest I very much desire to conquer
To become the ultimate warrior
Thus, the adventure MUST begin..
MUST never stop till the goal is achieved!

My LoW Ad - Day 1

Updating what I ate for lunch.... Nasi kenduri aka nasi minyak + beef curry + ulam + sambal belacan + ikan talang curry + dalca + air asam (pencicah) + 2 slices of orange & a glass of syrup. Banyak, kan? But I took in small quantity. Not so satisfying as the food was yummy but I had to control myself.... Berhenti makan sebelum kenyang (Stop eating before I was full). Then, while waiting for my kids to finish their music lesson, i ate a cup of delicious Sour Sop Cool Ice Kimo & cup corns... Later we headed to a water theme park (Carnivall) in SP. Hungry again so ate Maggi cup noodles + a glass of juice.. errr plus my kids' drinks too... hehehe... Guilty!

Tonight... For dinner... Steamboat... Can't say "NO".

In a nutshell.... my Day 1 isn't so successful. No worry. There's still tomorrow! Don't give up, wokey!:P

My LoW Ad-Day 1 (Breakfast & Lunch)

What did I eat this morning? Roti Arab dgn Sardin.... hmmmm.... and Horlicks... another hmmm...

Lunch? Kenduri kejap lagi...... alamak, abis ler My LoW Ad (My Losing Weight Adventure).... Calm down.. Don't panic. It's OK to eat but must control how much I eat. Btw, I want to do it slow & steady... no short cut... no stress... no pressure.... Losing weight isn't easy but should be FUN! Yeah!!! I'm sooo ready to go to the "kenduri".... hehehe.... Control the food intake, wokey!!

To Lose Or Not To Lose?

Roshey's World is always about me & me & me... I like poetry so whenever I feel like writing.. I just do it.... Yeah! I know most of my posts are my poems... which came straight from my thoughts. It's OK if you don't like them. I couldn't stop myself everytime the ideas came pouring in. I don't mind if people don't want to see my posts coz it's my world. It's so peaceful here. However, today it's different. No poem but more to the idea I call "To Lose Or Not To Lose".

Let me be honest... the idea has lingered for such a long time but procrastination is definitely a thief of time. I've delayed this plan though I know once I saw the number increased early of the year by 1kg I should take action. Better said than done! Yup! I really want to lose but it's been pending until TODAY!

Today, I learnt that my weight is 69.2 kg. Hmm.. Last year, 65. Early of the year 66 and now 69.2! Well, not as heavy as some other people but still this is something I've to stop before it's going to burden myself & my life. Even now, my health isn't as superb as before. I have lots of pains all over my body especially my feet. My hubby told me that sometimes our feet will cry in pain if our body is too heavy for them to handle... Just like what has happened to his auntie. She has to bear the pain due to her overweight body & endure surgery to lose her fat. I refuse to be fated to such fate. I'm sure I'm capable to control my body weight before all the fat takes control & ruins me!

That's why I've made up my mind to have a blog on my losing weight plan. By hook or by crook, it must go on as schedule. At first I thought I should start up a new blog yet after so much thinking & considering, I think Roshey's World is the best place. It's been My World & knowing that I can't handle too many blogs, let me post any entry about my losing weight adventure here. At least, this blog won't be abandoned....

Remember the date ya... 20 May.... 69.2kg. The adventure begins. I'll update anything related to my determination to get rid of the stubborn fat. Wish me the best of luck!!!!

pssttt... don't tell my hubby....let it be a surprise... hehehe...

The Loss

The loss is inaudible
no tears are shed
tearing deep in flesh
heart cries in void
mourning the probability
fantasy is abducted
another delay
losing...
another loss...
yet still hoping...

The Strike!

The agony struck harsh
vengeance soaked all in terror
cleaning the beauty of humanity
sorrow gushed out calamity
putting almost all to sleep

The stagnant eclipse rises in silence
flames gibber in wet darkness
lamenting breathes of lives
souls wither in daze
it is as it is

now and then
before and after
beginning and ending
ancient forefathers departed
newborns stand with unforeseen swords
moving on in a never-ending encircling story

***
as small dots in this universe
only He knows the final destiny.

Unwanted Rain

It rained again
couldn't help it
it's a good company

blinded sight
tore hearts
wounded souls
silenced voices
lost minds

choked in self
drowned inside
it's such a great enemy

misplaced downpour
misguided trail
missing cues
messy journey
sliced deep
was here to keep

the water ran
the fire glared
the earth shook
the ice dazed
i was soaked
all heated and frozen
caused endlessly
by the unwanted rain...